A good friend of mine once asked: "Wouldn't life be so much easier if everyone walked around wearing those AAPT T-shirts that said exactly what people were thinking?''.

You know the ads, where the people's T-shirts "tell it like it is''.

She was referring to our constant need to try to read people and situations in an attempt to work out what they are thinking, who likes who and what on earth does it mean when he says: "Let's catch up''.

Interpreting messages, waiting three days for a phone call, returning his email after waiting a day ...what is this game we're all playing and please tell me who made up the rules?

OK, so there are stacks of dating books out there telling us the guy needs to do the chasing and that if you go on a date he will probably wait "x'' number of days before calling you again.

There's even rules saying when it's OK to have your first kiss and your first sleep-over with a guy.

Hello? Who is making up these rules? Shouldn't we be able to trust our own judgement and common sense on this stuff?

Can't you just ask a guy out if it feels right?

I tend to break the "rules'' and while it doesn't always end well, I revel in the fact the guys I date get to know the real me and not some made-up, rule abiding pseudo-me.

Seriously, what's the point of pretending to be someone you're not, only to relax a few weeks into the relationship and reveal the real you and shock the life out of the person you're with?

Isn't it better for everyone to know who you're getting involved with from the start?

Surely you want a guy to be attracted to who you really are as a person, not someone you're pretending to be? I think taking advice is one thing, but living your life by a set of rules is not necessarily the way to go.

My sister always says: "If what you're doing makes you happy and makes you feel good, then it's the right thing for you to do'', and that's the only rule I abide by when it comes to dating.

JD