Now, about THAT girl...

THAT girl. You know the one. We all hate her.

She’s the girl that will be with a guy even though he has a girlfriend. She must be really easy. She must

be such a hussy. How can she live with herself?

We’ve all heard the stories . . . the guy who kissed ''that girl'' on the dance floor even though his girlfriend was there. The guy who kept sending

''that girl'' booty call messages late at night instead of going home to his girlfriend.

And although it’s the guy who is doing the lying and cheating in these stories, you will still hear people

comment about ''that girl''. . . ''Oh, she must have known about the girlfriend. Oh, she’s such a floozy.

That girl is awful!''

But what if that girl isn’t actually so horrible? What if she is just as vulnerable and nice as you? What if

she had no idea he had a girlfriend?

What if when he kissed her she pushed him away? What if she actually really liked him too and she is just as hurt to hear he was cheating?

Imagine for a minute how it feels to realise you are ''that girl''.

You thought you had met a great guy but now you learn he’s been lying to you the whole time and he made you become ''that girl'' without you knowing it. You never wanted to be a home wrecker.

The thing is ''that girl'' could be any of us. When we meet a guy we can only believe what he tells us . . . if he says he’s single, there’s no reason to believe

otherwise.

Sure, if you are the girlfriend who has been cheated on you have every right to be furious. Be as mad as you like, but make sure it’s directed at the right person. As hard as that can be, you probably need to face up to the fact that there are some serious problems in your relationship.

''That girl'' wasn’t the cause of the problems, she was possibly just the innocent bystander who unfortunately got involved in a terrible situation.

I’m sure there are some girls out there who deserve the title of ''that girl'' . . . the ones who know a guy

has a girlfriend but try to steal him away anyway. Or ''that girl'' who has an affair with a married man . . .

that’s not cool.

But even in the worst situations there are people’s feelings involved and anyone who is not directly

involved in it should be very careful not to judge ''that girl'' too quickly.

What about ''that guy''? When does he take some responsibility for his actions?