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 Is it possible to do it all? 

Is it possible to do it all?

Is it possible to maintain domestic order, raise well-adjusted children, pursue a career, pay attention to personal grooming, and still retain your mental health?

I used to think so. Now I suspect that the Superwoman that manages all these things is an urban myth. Surely only celebrity Yummy Mummies (with their bevy of paid staff) manage to have immaculate houses, size 8-10 backsides, fulfilling careers and well-groomed offspring… all at the same time. Personally the rigours of wifedom & motherhood often leave me feeling washed up, burnt out or stretched to breaking point. Not to mention being in constant desperate need of an extreme makeover. At times the thought of another day spent juggling a part-time job, toilet training, homework, housework, & after school sport is enough to book myself in for a frontal lobotomy. On those days the urge to run around screaming ‘stop the world – I want to get off’ or alternatively to curl up in the foetal position in a dark room, is frequent and intense, and only held at bay by the consumption of much calorie-laden comfort food.

And it’s not just occasional binge eating I need to confess. I don’t bake, I can’t successfully cover schoolbooks with contact, and I’m still getting zits despite the fact that I’m old enough to have visible ‘fine lines’ (surely that’s one of life’s great injustices? I would have thought there’d be at least a decade between acne and wrinkles).

I can’t parallel park, I let my legs get quite hairy in winter (okay, honestly, not just my legs, and not just in winter), and despite my status as a respectable married woman I really can’t hold my liquor. I’m always late for work, I’ve never managed to convince my children to eat broccoli or pumpkin, and sometimes I let them play x-box, in their pyjamas, before breakfast.

Why make my shameful inadequacies public you ask? Why share my tales of domestic and social ineptitude? Maybe I feel that the recent influx of glamorous mothers on our modern landscape has left the suburban soccer mum voiceless. Maybe I feel that my disenfranchised sisters need someone to stand up and say “It’s okay if you can’t bare your midriff and retain your dignity simultaneously.”

Or maybe I’ve just discovered that writing a column makes for excellent housework avoidance.

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Comments


I'm sure just about everyone has seen Desperate Housewives, or at least heard a great deal about it. Let me ask everyone, do you idealise the characters in the show? Do you desire to be Bree Van de Kamp with her tidy house, and domestic goddess lifestyle? Raising perfect children with delicious apple pies? Do you compare your failures to her (and any other characters') perfections? Remember that she is flawed. Each character on Desperate Housewives is flawed in some way or another. None of them are perfect. This is precisely why they are 'desperate'. We are told by society that we should be perfect, and yet we need to be totally aware of the impossibility of this task. If you binge eat, or struggle parallel parking, or let your legs get hairy- then that is ok. If you love yourself, and show love to others, that is what matters the most.
Posted by Jules on 21/05/2008 8:44:30 AM
I can totally relate!! Even though I feel like I am constantly cleaning and tidying up, my house is always messy (3 boys!) and if I drop in to a friends theirs always seems to be spotless. So what am I doing wrong? I am always feeling like I just dont measure up and feel like I am behind the eight ball all the time. But I have to stop myself and look at my children and try to remember to just enjoy them. I have to put aside the ironing and washing and sit and build lego or kick a ball because they are growing up so quickly that before I know it they wont want to do that with mum because thats daggy. So my advice is to look at the important things in life,like your family and let the mess sit for a while longer. Who cares if its a mess when friends drop in? You could always make an excuse and say that you are just having a big clean up just before they arrived!!!
Posted by violet on 21/05/2008 12:53:58 PM
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Soccer mum
A mum shares tales of domestic bliss, fears of ineptitude and ways to avoid the housework!

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